FOOD FOR THOUGHT #1

we are not perfect, we are flawed…

we are young, we dont understand love…

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REASONS TO BELIEVE

I believe although we may not understand why, everything happens for a reason

I believe everyone deserves a chance, a first and a second

I believe everyone has potential I believe there is someone for everyone

I believe if we tried things we didn’t know we were capable of, we would astound ourselves

 I believe today’s society is focused on flaws rather than individuality

I believe we strive for perfection because it’s one of the only things that is out of our reach

I believe in world peace, equality and social justice

 I believe we judge others only because we are insecure with ourselves

I believe we take too much for granted

I believe it is important to not only be honest with others, but to be honest with yourself

I believe in the importance of family and friends I believe it is important to dream

I believe it is more important to chase after those dreams

I believe we don’t tell our loved ones how we feel as often as we should

I believe fear holds us back from so many things, so go for the things you’re afraid of

I believe our background influences who we are, but we are responsible for who we become

I believe that in time all of life’s hardest questions can be answered

I believe in a place called Heaven

I believe we are stronger than we could ever imagine

I believe that without suffering there would be no compassion

I believe you don’t know what you have until it’s gone

 I believe we should forgive, but never forget

I believe we are afraid to love, because we are afraid to lose

 I believe in miracles I believe that one person alone could change the world


LOVERS & FRIENDS

 

 Sometimes I wonder if friends are better off as friends

Or, but when our friends become our lovers.

What really happens? What changes?

Is there a separation between the lover and the friend?

 Sometimes we fall back on love.

We let it pass, because the friendship means so much more to us.

 

Sometimes we use friendship is the gate way to escape the truth.

That we aren’t feeling the same way or simply don’t want this love.

Do we cross the line or do we let it burn.

The questions we should ask ourselves in the end…

Is it better falling in love with a stranger or friend?


RANT#2: Do Me A Favour..Call Me ‘Nice’ One More Time…

 

“Nice Guys Finish Last”

A statement without a definitive meaning.

The only people oblivious to the obvious truths about this statement are women themselves. They continually announce that they just want a nice guy in their lives. When in actuality, a nice guy may be considered a remedy for their broken hearts. A temporary fix to the pain they feel when the ‘jerks’ hurt them..
There is always a great deal of palaver in relation to the statement…

Women advocating that nice guys are what they want, and that they tired of assholes.

Men advocating that being the nice guy, gets you nowhere near where you want to be.

What girls really want and where they end up with are two different things. It seems apparent but neither men or women learn that we dont always get what we want or necessarily need what we want.

The appeal for the ‘jerks’ is that they are interesting, and even when they are pissing you off and hurting you… they’re on your mind. These types of guys present a challenge, women believe they can change these guys, mould them in their image of a man. They enjoy the edginess that these guys provide, so no matter what happens they’re always on a females mind. women subconsciously develop a strange attraction and they find themselves unwilling to break free of this hold, because off the unpredictability of what could become of these types of men. As this pattern seems to repeat itself over and over girls realize it, and complain about it.

 Nothing changes. For a woman to go out of her way and notice a nice guy there needs to be an extreme situation that causes them to look for something different. This change in interest arises for them when they have exhausted their emotions on the males they find more appealing.

 Most girls would argue, and say I have been with ‘jerks’ and I am over that. Really they just go find another jerk hiding underneath different skin. The ‘jerks and ‘nice guys’ provide a balance for the emotions of a female. ‘Jerks’ being the thrill and excitement… ‘Nice Guys’ being the refill for the ego.

 The truth is nice guys end up being the best friend type of guy to most women, someone to keep around because they make women feel good about themselves. Nice guys can make women feel like there is hope for them for a prince charming. They tend to overlook what’s in front of them, and give in to their desires. Nice guys tend to be stagnant for women, they are often predictable… “what you see is what you get” 

 Even to this extent you will have men who hear the words ‘nice’ and cringe knowing that the possible outcomes of that particular situation they want have ended or will ultimately end in the friendship zone. Women defend themselves and maintain, that they want a nice guy in their lives, all the time avoiding the truth of the matter being..its just not you…where the famous line could be used…”its not you its me!”

On the flipside ‘nice guys’ set themselves up sometimes, their willingness to be attentive and be the opposite of the jerk, makes them a target for women. Women will walk all over these type of ‘nice guys’. The sad reality is once most guy end up in this cycle it is difficult for them to change their ways. The same way it is difficult for a female to wean themselves off from ‘jerks’.


RANT#1: RELATIONSHIPS. COMITTMENT. LOVE.

People do not often know what they are looking when it comes to relationships. Most times…People in relationships are in them for all the wrong reasons.

Our insecurities drive us to places we don’t need to be. Places we feel our insecurities are safe because those places are better than the place we’re in when we’re alone.
We have all envisioned of the perfect situation with the right person, and once we get that….some of us turn around full circle and question it and act as if we are not satisfied.

There are two themes that always emerge in human behaviour

There are those that find it hard to let go, and hold on as long as possible.
Then there those of us who do not want to get into too deep, and tend shy away from serious relationships.
Some of us hang around for the comfort of having someone to be with. The fear of being alone tends to have people holding onto things they really should be letting go.

The amount time that we invest in the relationships is also something we consider that keeps us right where we are, simply because most of us believe the old time saying:

“Love isn’t easy to come by, you have to work for it.”

When do you know when it’s enough? Should you always fight for a dying love? Things either grow stronger or they get weak and die. Sometimes it’s okay to let go.

We tend to question the worth of the relationship…whether this person the right person?

 Will we ever be satisfied with what we have or are we content?

 Are we just waiting for the next best thing to come along?

Sometimes a relationship just isn’t the place we want/need to be so we just up and leave…

Truth is when it comes to emotions we are selfish people.

In the process of getting to know each other we have habits of trying to find all the flaws to the situation we are dealing with. We subconsciously look for and identify negative traits/ pet peeves in the person so if given a reason to walk away we have one.

These subconscious thoughts we have sometimes elude us, we give in into our lustful and most natural behaviours. This type of tunnel of vision behaviour has us contemplating and ignoring some opportunities that may be right in front of us and we miss out on them, because we are so focused on the dream.

For those of us who are afraid to commit or who place our standards on the highest esteem (we’re allowed to do this; I believe one should never settle.) We cannot forget that we are from perfect ourselves, and what we want may not always want us. We all hold ourselves to the highest esteem, and when that glass shattered, our confidence and motivation suffers as well.

We retreat into solitude and build a wall higher than the one that was up before. One that’s more solid and hard to conquer, eventually we forget what it was for, and why it was up and we become afraid to see what is on the other side, afraid to take chances.

I am not saying that love and relationships are bad. The fact is they are complicated. Love is ability, something inherent. It’s not something we choose to do. It just happens. When relationships are good they are good, we all deserve a chance to be loved, but do we ever give people the opportunity to love us?

Maybe relationships are about challenging each other to grow. Someone that care so much that they will do whatever they must to support you and know when to push and when to pull.
Some of are capable of receiving love and giving it back, and some of us just don’t know how to handle love.

Relationships do not define love & love does not define a relationship.
Sometimes love is about learning to cope with each other’s bullshit. Knowing the flaws in each other and being able to say that’s what I like about you.

Instead of looking for the flaws why we don’t just ride the wave and see where it takes us.
Why has the process of getting into relationship become an evaluation of each other?


LORD WHY DID YOU MAKE ME BLACK?

Why did I make you black?
Why did I make you black?

I made you in the color of coal
from which beautiful diamonds are formed…
I made you in the color of oil,
the black gold which keeps people warm.

Your color is the same as the rich dark soil
that grows the food you need…
Your color is the same as the black stallion and
panther, Oh what majestic creatures indeed!

All colors of the heavenly rainbow
can be found throughout every nation…
When all these colors are blended,
you become my greatest creation!

Your hair is the texture of lamb’s wool,
such a beautiful creature is he…
I am the shepherd who watches them,
I will ALWAYS watch over thee!

You are the color of the midnight sky,
I put star glitter in your eyes…
There’s a beautiful smile hidden behind your pain…
That’s why your cheeks are so high!

You are the color of dark clouds
from the hurricanes I create in September…
I made your lips so full and thick,
so when you kiss….they will remember!

Your stature is strong,
your bone structure thick to withstand the
burden of time…
The reflection you see in the mirror,
that image that looks back,..that is MINE!

So get off your knees,
look in the mirror and tell me what you see?
I didn’t make you in the image of darkness…
I made you in the image of ME!


QUOTES – CONFICIUS

JUST A FEW THINGS THAT JUMPED UP AT ME. WHEN I READ THEM.

” ignorance is the night of the mind, but a night without moon and star” – confucius

 

 “our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in getting up every time we do.” – conficius

 

“by three methods we may learn wisdom: first, by reflection, which is noblest; second, by imitation, which is easiest; and third by experience, which is the bitterest.” – conficius

 

 “everything has beauty, but not everyone sees it. “– conficius

 

 “I hear, I know. I see, I remember. I do, I understand.” – conficius

 

“If you shoot for the stars and hit the moon, it’s okay. but you’ve got to shoot for something. a lot of people don’t even shoot.” – confucius

 

“life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated.” – confucius

 

 “our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.” – conficius

 

“success depends upon previous preparation, and without such preparation there is sure to be failure.” – confucius

 

“the will to win, the desire to succeed, the urge to reach your full potential… these are the keys that will unlock the door to personal excellence. ” – confucius

 

“what you do not want done to yourself, do not do to others.” – conficius

 

“when anger rises, think of the consequences.” – conficius

 

“you cannot open a book without learning something.” – conficius